The Divorcee 2Favorites [+]
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It's a pretty well-established fact that porn has been the downfall of many marriages and relationships since the rise of the internet. So, does anyone else see the irony of a porn movie that centers on divorcees? Truth be told, this is actually the second installment of what we like to call the "unlucky in love, but lucky in lust" series by Smash Pictures. (We actually don't like to call it that at all. That just came to us right at the moment we typed that sentence. We're kinda clever like that.) We suppose it really shouldn't be a surprise that the smut minions in Chatsworth are tackling the delicate topic of divorce as they've covered just about everything else: farmers, policemen, doctors, politicians, gnomes (probably), fortune tellers, zombies and so on. About the only thing left untouched in the realm of porn is probably anal cream pie-loving Siamese twin zither players... though it's rumored some company is in pre-production with that one right now.
While the topic is no surprise, neither is the fact volume two of the runaway success is damn good, though we'll readily admit it's a damn shame that Ron Jeremy was unable to make a reprise role as the judge. Subbing in for the iconic Jeremy, however, is the lovely and highly MILF-y Julia Ann. She's much nicer to look at than ol' Ron, though he has slightly bigger boobs. (It's a joke, people. We love Ron!)
The first case on the docket involves Gracie Glam and Mark Wood. It's a complex case, though you wouldn't know it by the fact that Mark is cocky enough to represent himself. Gracie's attorney, Alec Knight, is really hoping for a grant this time as they've been to court six times previously to lay out the case that Mark is a pig; he's asexual; and he owns what Gracie claims is a shrinking penis. The good news is he apparently doesn't hate nuns and orphans... or at least Gracie didn't bring that up in testimony. Mark's defense is that he's offered her the house, the cars and even the clothes off his back and she's taken it all. He's sleeping in a van down by the river! Actually, it's a car by the gas station, but you get the point. Judge Julia, however, is not impressed and rules in favor of Gracie. Mark then has to watch as Gracie and her attorney share an embrace and a celebratory slap on the ass. But Mark is the REAL winner here. First, he's free of that bitch. Second, the blonde, big-titted court reporter Kagney Linn Karter takes pity on him and consoles him with a pep talk and a sweet-ass blowjob. Then he gets to nuzzle her bosom and drive his face between those awesome tits. She dirty talks him while he thrusts his menacingly large gavel into her cooch from behind. They bang each other in RCG, CG and mish and he dumps a charity case-sized load of cum onto her gigantic tits.
Meanwhile, Gracie is in the judge's chambers trying to figure out a way to thank her attorney. He's already getting 10% of her take as his fee, but as a bonus, he's about to get 100% of his cock covered in uvula. In court, Mark Wood may have had his ass handed to him by force, but behind the scenes, Gracie voluntarily hands her ass to Alec. They strip out of their legal briefs and he squeezes his mug between her lovely ass cheeks. Then, she goes for a long ride in his hard-top cock. He corks her pussy in doggie and then informs her he works on contingency. That is, her repayment is contingent on his jizzing all over her face.
Taylor Vixen and Bill Bailey are the next couple that can't play nice. Bill apparently can't play house correctly either, choosing to fuck Taylor's sister rather than bring home the bacon and his sausage for his wife. Not to mention his sister's double-wide killed their lawn. Judge Julia requests Taylor approach the bench. They're going to have a sidebar in the judge's chambers. First, however, ol' Bill finds solace in a sympathetic observer. That woman is Jenna Presley. Her bulging tits and slit are ripe for tongue and fingers respectively. She's a dirty talker to the hilt, but you'll hear no objections from us. They fuck in CG, mish and spoon on the plaintiff's table and then Bill spits cum across those gorgeous tits.
Back in chambers, Judge Julia is talking to Taylor to decide how she can move the divorce process along more quickly. Taylor has some ideas and they all involve getting naked with Julia. In a really hot scene, Julia sensually removes Taylor's blouse and slides her entire forearm up Taylor's skirt, undoing the clasp around her waist. She tugs Taylor's panties down around her hips and dispenses a series of spankings. Julia disrobes (literally … 'cause she's a judge and all) and slips out of her fiery red bra, freeing up her huge hooters. She tongue tickles Taylor's twat, then slips a couple fingers inside her dewy pussy. Taylor takes the reins next, licking and fingering Julia on top of her desk. Here come the judge! Here come the judge!
The last case involves Brandy Aniston and Brian Aniston. Brian is not present, however, as he fled the country, which just about seals his fate. It's not like the judge hasn't shown a little female favoritism anyway... but wait! Christian XXX steps in as Brian's legal representation, informing the judge that Brian had a health issue, which forced him to take up a little R&R in a warm and humid climate. Bullshit! *cough* Brandy wants a recess of her own to speak to her husband's attorney. She wants a resolution to the case, but knows that, as long as her husband is out of the country, it is an impossibility. She finagles a deal with Christian to help get the ball rolling. Speaking of balls, Christian's find their way into Brandy's sweet mouth, as do the head and shaft of his stiff cock. Brandy is yet another large-breasted specimen, which makes the casting decisions on the women in this film seem much more purposeful and less coincidental. The two go at it spoon-style, followed by CG and RCG, followed by the obligatory cumshot into the mouth. It ensures a happy ending for Christian and Brandy. As for Brian... well, at least he's somewhere in a warm and humid climate.
If you're a fan of beautiful women, giant tits, divorcees, movie sequels and courtroom drama then this film is a must-see.
5 Scenes from The Divorcee 2